Low Tide

So much change is in the air and i can say it feels amazing.

Tomorrow starts the first day of my internship and its amazing- i know its going to be hard and a struggle at times but I'm so ready for it.

I'm starting to become a grown up and being a good steward of my money- I figured if God blessed me with it then he would want me to be responsible and not waste it. So i made a budget :)

My sibling are all now in all day school. The youngest just entered first grade yesterday and my parent's house is dead quiet. MOVIE TIME!!!

Lastly, something is coming...a big change and i can't put my finger on it. I half feel like I'm going crazy sensing things in my spirit but...its coming and its something good. Something exciting! Its like waiting for the tide to come in- i know whatever it is won't be here for a few months but its coming and i have to get ready some way as I wait on edge. I can't wait!

Summer Set

This weekend the summer is coming to a close- official only by the start of school. I have been waiting so long for it to end. I have enjoyed myself but at this point I feel like I have been living inside my head more than i can stand. The longer you sit still the longer you mull thoughts over, the more you do that the more dirt you dig up, the more you dig up the more pain you feel, the more pain the more baggage you realize you have. The sad part is that i want summer to end cause i know i will be super busy these last two semester so the more work the less time i will have to think about things i would rather forget you know?

Cutting ties, cutting strings and," I will see you when I see you". Actually it kind of hurts.

If you want to be honest, I'm happy its ending so i can stop faking whats really going on with me to people. I mean my close friends know, trusted people from church, if I love you I will tell you( if you ask me that is)- anyone else I will put on the smiley face, keep the answers vague and pretend what ever I have to be that the situation allows. Its not right but its what I do till i figure whats top and whats bottom or at least if i want to let you through the wall.

My summer has been amazing- crap and all. Cause I know God has been growing me and stretching me in ways that I'm sure will have meaning some day. I have spent many weeks with the most wonderful of friends laughing, talking about life, watching movies and playing RockBand. I have started serving at my church which has opened up a total new dimension to my life. My family is amazing right now and getting ready for school. And I am awaiting what will happen next as the Fall unfolds :)

Always a Woman

As I woke up this morning I found myself humming this song as it stuck in my head.Technically its before my time but I really like it anyway. I think it reminds me of a woman's strength and power and how we need to be careful with it. It also reminds me of just how stubborn my resolve can be when it comes to things, which I honestly count as a strength rather than a weakness. And in this time its that very God-given resolve that I am holding onto to push through this mess.

Billy Joel She's Always a Woman to me Lyrics: She can kill with a smile, she can wound with her eyes She can ruin your faith with her casual lies And she only reveals what she wants you to see She hides like a child, but she's always a woman to me She can lead you to love, she can take you or leave you She can ask for the truth, but she'll never believe you And she'll take what you give her as long it's free Yeah, She steals like a thief, but she's always a woman to me CHORUS Ohhh... she takes care of herself She can wait if she wants, she's ahead of her time [ Find more Lyrics on www.mp3lyrics.org/bN ] Ohhh... and she never gives out And she never gives in, she just changes her mind And she'll promise you more than the garden of Eden Then she'll carelessly cut you and laugh while you're bleeding But she’ll bring out the best and the worst you can be Blame it all on yourself 'cause she's always a woman to me CHORUS She's frequently kind and she's suddenly cruel She can do as she pleases, she's nobody's fool And she can't be convicted, she's earned her degree And the most she will do is throw shadows at you, But she's always a woman to me CHORUS

Silence

I guess its no coincidence when you find the perfect lyrics to describe your heart and also you're relationship with God.

Come Back to Me by David Cook